My First Blog Ever

Wow, how do I ever follow my wife and kids and their wonderful online diaries...well, it will be difficult, but I am going to try...

We have been here for a week now...it is beginning to feel like home a bit. I am getting used to the sleeping changes, I am learning the crazy routes in and out of town, and my body is adjusting to the whole thing.

Today was full of many errands; looking for generator parts, looking for an apartment for a pastor intern and his family, Melody needed some bread and margerine, buying misquito nets, and picking up a few cell phones for our team communications, and it was there, in downtown Kigali where I saw the face of Christ today (when you do this to the least of these you do it unto me) in 3 very poor woman a widow and two single moms who were begging. (See Photo of two moms)

These three women just broke my heart...I should say their circumstances did. When Cyprien, GFR's finance Director went in to the store to purchase the phones, I was left alone in the car, for quite some time. It is an awkward feeling to have everyone, and I mean EVERYONE stare at your and hold their stare as they pass by. It is like a neon sign above my vehicle saying "$$WHITEMAN HERE$$" or "MUZUNGU AT YOUR SERVICE".

Not long into my waiting period, an elderly woman probably in her 70's, one of the thinnest women I have ever seen, approached my drivers side window with her hand extended and gently cupped. My mind told me "Ben, be smart here...if you give her anything, you will be mobbed by other beggars, JUST IGNORE HER!" MUST NOT MAKE EYE CONTACT! Back home I had grown caliced to beggars in Chicago, many times ignoring them and going on with my day...so I thought this would be no problem. The beggars in Chicago leave pretty bluntly if they see you won't breakdown and pitch em a buck in their time frame. But in Kigali, the desperation is so DESPERATE, that this precious woman stayed there and stayed there and continued to leave her hand out. Then she tapped on the window. I thought of the widow in the Bible who waited outside knocking on the door of the judge until he would get up and answer the door.

My mind was all over the place, "what can I read?" or "Maybe I can call someone on the phone and she will go?" or "what would Jesus do in my shoes? and "Lord, what do you want me to do?" then "God, are you sure you want me to give her 5000 Rwandan Francs?" (approx $9.00USD) What if everyone mobs me, I can't give everyone money...

Then our eyes locked. Her eyes said so much. I could not turn away. Had I been scammed? She had me in her spell. NO! This woman was the LEAST OF THESE and she was STARVING!

My car door was very close to the next car. I opened it a crack, and she got scared and began to walk away. I said "gueeno" (spelling way off, but it means come here) I touched her soft leatherly hand. I choked back tears, I said "jesus christ loves you" in Rwandan and put a 5000 Rwandan Franc bill in her hand tightly wound up in a cylinder type roll. The man next to me was trying to get into his car so she scurried away saying "Murachaze Cynne" or "thank you too much". I watched her from a distance and saw her unfold the bill. She threw her hands up in joy, and looked back at me and I waived to her and a tear fell down my cheek, and I let it fall down all the way under my chin and onto my chest. I wanted to stay in the moment. I thought about what she would do with the money. I wondered if she would go a block down and purchase a loaf of bread (300 Rwandan Francs) or maybe some fresh fruit, or some shoes...I don't know. What I do know, is that I did the right thing. When everything inside me was telling me "toughen up" and "don't fall for this" a still small voice was telling me differnt.

What is that still small voice telling you today? Who is your "Least of these?" What are you going to do about it? Don't forget to ask God what He wants you to do when you have a storm of thoughts in your head, and wait for His answer.

Signing out and going to bed...
Remember YOU ARE LOVED! Ben